That's Mr. Fart Face to You

When I see kids at work with articulation disorders, the goal is to make them intelligible, right? But after a conversation I had on Friday with a completely intelligible eight year-old, I'm not sure if this is a great idea.

On Friday I am the only person at work, besides our office manager. This makes for a quiet waiting room. So at 2 p.m. I went down the hall to get a kid we'll call Little Johnnie (because that is the name every speech therapist uses to describe a generic kid, or to not reveal a kid's identity). There was no one in the waiting room except for Little Johnnie, who is three and some kid I'd never seen before, but looked to be about eight. He was playing with a Rescue Hero. This was our conversation:

Me: Hey Little Johnnie, where's your mom?

Little Johnnie: Dahtare. (translation: "She is downstairs with my older brother, parking the van.")

Me: Oh. And who'd you bring with you?

Little Johnnie: Dit ded pen kjajbihbbassjb (translation: "This is my older brother's friend, kjajbihbbassjb")

kjajbihbbassjb: "Are you the speech teacher?"

Me: "Yes I am."

kjajbihbbassjb: "Fart face!!"

At this point kjajbihbbassjb spiked the rescue hero and ran out of the waiting room, crashed into the main door to the suite on his way out, and then sprinted down the hall. I could hear him laughing as he ran off.

I never did find out what kjajbihbbassjb's real name was (the close reader will have noted that Little Johnnie has some articulation issues), and apparently kjajbihbbassjb never found out what mine was.